"Little" Problem

Sportsfreak
Need some advice. If you are sensitive about the sex topic I wouldn't suggest reading further. I have been seeing this guy for a couple months. A few weeks ago we started having sex............well he did. For anyone who says that size does not matter they need to be in my shoes. It's terrible. I can't feel ANYTHING and get no pleasure what so ever from us being intimate. What makes it worse is that he knows it AND proceeds to point out that I'm not getting anything out of our sex. Every time he'll say something like "you aren't getting anything at all out of this are you?" I feel bad but what do you say to that? It's not like I am just laying there. I do try to atleast act like I am getting something out of it but he can tell that I'm not. The other day we were shopping for him some shoes and when I asked him what size we needed to look for he said 13. He then proceeded to say "whoever made up the rule about shoe size and penis size is full of sh** aren't they?" What do you say to that???????? My question is. Can a relationship with virtually no sex last? I realize you can do other things but intercourse is very important....at least it is to me. My other question is what on earth do I say when he knows good and well that I am not getting anything out of our sex and he asks me every time if I am. I feel like breaking it off with him because of this would be shallow but I'm sorry I'm a 29 year old woman and I have needs.

Springfoam
This is pretty tough, but you're not being satisfied and he knows it. You can continue and continue to be unhappy or break it off. To keep sleeping someone who can satisfy you at all is a disaster. His feelings will be hurt but that's life. I'm sure in the long run he will find someone he can satisfy.

julesincny
um, are you being satisfied in other ways by him? does he use his hands and/or mouth to help you reach orgasm without waiting for intercourse? and if he is so small that you are not tight enough for him, how does he reach orgasm?

Danger Russ
Does he at least have a Corvette to compensate?

trudyML
Have you discussed your wants, needs, things you like?

Robert_not_Bobby
My question is. Can a relationship with virtually no sex last? Not a happy one. You'll end up living like brother and sister...and you will look elsewhere.

SultryD
My ex boyfriend had a "little" problem and no it did not last and no it did not get better....at all.

Sportsfreak
He does try orally but he has yet to bring me to an orgasm. He gets off during sex but obviously I don't and to top things off he isn't doing it orally either. We haven't really discussed it per se but last night I got **** at him because he did go down on me but quit before I climaxed. We had been drinking and when we were having intercourse he was having a difficult time staying hard and he had the nerve to ask me to "finish him off orally" and I gave him the look of death. He was like "I'm sorry I didn't' mean to make you mad" and we just went to sleep. I'm sorry there is no way in hell I am going to "finish him off" orally when he has yet to give me an orgasm EVER. It was like he was saying "well I can't get you off so sucks to be you but let's go ahead and let me get mine". No way in hell. Other than sex we get along great and have a good time. He is a good guy, with a good job, and is a rare find at my age (29) in that he has never been married (I now know why) and doesn't have any kids (same thing). He has taken care of me when I was really sick and is in general a good person however this is a really major issue to me. I am a very physical person and sex is important to me. This really sucks.

quickblade14
If the type of sexual pleasure you want and consider a priority in a relationship cannot be had with him - that's not shallow, it's intelligent - to accept that no matter how wonderful of a "person" you are - there is not enough of waht I consider a priority in a relationship to make that work with you.I'd say break up - this isn't a fixable problem.....there's no 12-step program for this on either of your parts, tehre is no "rehab" - there might be surgical options for him...but that'd be something he'd have to pursue and fund, and live with the results of, etc.I personally think he's compounding the issue in people he dates by bringing it up, etc. He's probably been told it's "too small' - by some source he considers important/credible/etc. So now his approach is "what you can't deny - start up" a a discussion. It's a great manipulation tactic, or it could be if you let it be one.I personally wouldn't consider the equipment size and a partner's lack of interest in sex as an activity to be any different.....I wouldn't be with someone that didn't enjoy sex and regularly have it pleasurable with me (pleasure on both sides).....and there's nothing wrong with "this just isn't working out for me sorry" - as a statement.Alot of what is wrong - is that he keeps disparging his size, he keeps bringing it up - it becomes the focus of attention...while he's learning to do little with the pen to develop penmanship. that wouldn't eliminate a size issue - but it'd make it less a focus.

SultryD
I am a very physical person and sex is important to me. This really sucks. Tell me about it. I've been in your shoes. The seemingly perfect guy with that one little problem. It really sucks the big one.. at least your guy tries oral...my ex didn't even do that and then I just start suspecting he was gay. It's a problem that leads to frustration and frustration that might be taken out elsewhere.....I don't know what to tell you. If you stay with him this is always be a problem (unless though enhancement infomercials work!)

Danger Russ
How small are we talking about here anyways? I keep hearing about guys the size of a thumb, but I think this has got to be an exaggeration... Its really a shi++y situation. Life is so cruel. I'd rather be born retarded than with a little dick.

lightmike
You have compatibility issues...you need to find a better fit. (pun intended). Size doesn't matter if pleasure is had by all, which it isn't happening, as he doesn't make up for his shortcomings. He deserves an opportunity to grow as a person, so let him know why he has fallen short, so he might be able to broaden himself to please someone else down the long road ahead.

SultryD
Its really a shi++y situation. Life is so cruel. I'd rather be born retarded than with a little dick. aww don't say that . You can always "compensate" by going to the gym every day........like we don't know

Sportsfreak
I'd never really heard that expression but I'd say the size of a thumb would be pretty accurate...lol I'll tell you what. This has made me appreciate some former boyfriends who weren't really that big but not this small a whole lot more...lol

mike_a
I would break it off, but be nice about it he already has a small d.ick. As the saying goes..."If you can't hit bottom at least slap the s.hit out of the sides."

Springfoam
I am a very physical person and sex is important to me. This really sucks. I also dated one guy for a short time who had this problem, fortunately we just were not compatible in other ways and went our separate ways which was a good thing.

lightmike
This has made me appreciate some former boyfriends who weren't really that big but not this small "boyfriends" you say...as in plural...There are women with large parts who need men with large parts it seems...

lilbitsingle
I married a guy that I thought I could overlook that part of him. Sex was so lame that it wasn't worth taking my clothes off. I tried to get him to use toys, but he was too proud for that. I tried different positions and doggie was the best, but still not much there either. I totally understand. Seriously, my ex was the size of a baby carrot. I always told myself they gave him the middle name "Guy" because they weren't sure. I tell my girlfriend, I accidently on purpose do a package check before I say yes to a date. I know that is terrible, but I don't want to go through that again.

Sportsfreak
Thanks guys. I guess I needed a little reassurance that I wasn't a complete bit** for dumping a relatively great guy because he can't perform in the sack......lol I'd give anything to change it but this isn't something you can fix. Now I just have to figure out how on earth I am going to do this without being obvious about the reason why.

quickblade14
"There is nothing worse than sucking a little di.ck" - that's a line in a movie - I just can't remember which one. And that line was given in the context of this thread.

Danger Russ
I guess I needed a little reassurance that I wasn't a complete bit** for dumping a relatively great guy because he can't perform in the sackDon't feel bad. We would dump you too if you were a lousy lay.

lightmike
Thread within a thread...women question...If a guy were 5 1/2 inches but was thick in diameter, that would be far superior to 7 1/2 inches and skinny. In other words, size matters when we are talking diameter, so long as we get over the minimum height requirement?

Not Your Typical
I'd never really heard that expression but I'd say the size of a thumb would be pretty accurateMy ex (who to this I think is bi-polar) also has this problem, but like Springfoam, we didn't click well in other ways either, so I ended up breaking things off with him. The year I was with him was a long one, since he never once made me orgasm, and it was so bad to the point that I hated having sex with him. (it didn't help that the first time we went to have sex he tells me, "it's small isn't it?", so every time we would have sex I'd have the quote running through my head over and over again.) I suggest,before you get to this point, if you don't see any way it could work out, end it now.

mike_a
I tried to get him to use toys, but he was too proud for that.Why are guys so afraid of toys? Well I guess if your smaller then the toys that could make you realize you have a small d.ick.

Sportsfreak
5 1/2 inches and thick is good. Girth does help a lot but like you said it has to have some length to it. Seriously there are such things as being TOO big however that's a far better problem to have than being too small...lol Too big we can adjust to in time, to small there is no solution to that problem.

mike_a
Seriously there are such things as being TOO big however that's a far better problem to have than being too small...lol Too big we can adjust to in time, to small there is no solution to that problem. Not every girl can though. Some girls can get used to it but it still hurts from time to time. At least that's been my experience.

Danger Russ
Ok Mike, don't click here unless you are sure you can handle the truth... Ideal Penis Size This 'scientific' site says that anyone who isn't in the 90th percentile might as well go ahead and kill themselves now.

lightmike
......lol I'd give anything to change it but this isn't something you can fix. Actually it is...it's called milking. The gays do it as many of them are "size queens". Semi hard lubricated member, pull down slowly but very firmly, grabbing with index and thumb, repeat 50 times a day for 2 - 3 months. Maintain new size by once a week excercises.

Sportsfreak
Not every girl can though. Some girls can get used to it but it still hurts from time to time. At least that's been my experience. Darlin we have babies.......lol Trust me they can physically adjust. You just may be too aggressive too soon and that may be why it hurt them. One of my exes was really big and he didn't give me enough time to get use to it before he tried to "knock the bottom out of it"....lol and it hurt but we finally got it straight :)

lightmike
This 'scientific' site says that anyone who isn't in the 90th percentile might as well go ahead and kill themselves now.Fortunately I have empirical evidence that this is not the truth.

mike_a
Darlin we have babies.......lol Trust me they can physically adjustNot saying they can't just saying sometimes. Sometimes being the key word. Russ - Nice chart. LOL So I fall into a A/B. woo hoo I dont have to kill myself.

DeliriouslyHappy
Darlin we have babies.......lol Trust me they can physically adjust.yes, but Lisa...our bodies dilate during labor to prepare for the birthing process...we cant do it at will for sexual purposes, as convenient as that may be sometimes...

SultryD
Actually it is...it's called milking. The gays do it as many of them are "size queens". Semi hard lubricated member, pull down slowly but very firmly, grabbing with index and thumb, repeat 50 times a day for 2 - 3 months. Maintain new size by once a week excercises. ****???

Sportsfreak
I think killing yourself would just be easier....lol

whyme-again
Actually it is...it's called milking.I've never heard of "milking"...I've heard of basically the same description as given called "jelqing"...

slinky9
well I can't get you off so sucks to be you but let's go ahead and let me get mine". I stopped reading right there, and haven't read any of the responses, but this sentence alone tells me DUMP HIM. Someone who is "small", but does everything he can to please you, is someone that you may want to stay with. But someone like this ? So selfish and inconsiderate ? No freakin' way.Dump him. You're not breaking up with him because of his small pe.nis, you're breaking up with him because he's a selfish idiot. Don't give it a second thought.