A few Ideas, please?

notquitesure
My gf and I have our 2 year anniversary coming up in December. I would like some ideas of something special to do if you guys/gals had any. I live in the Chicago area if that helps. There is tons to do here, but I can't think of everything, you know? We're 23/22, so being under 21 is no barrier. I've had a few ideas, but nothing I felt was really great. And on a side note. The gf and I discussed how we both felt our physical relationship was lacking...lost our flame a little. Any ideas how to get that back on track as well???

Savoir Faire
HOw about staying in a hotel in Chicago, and going to a show.

PNW_Woman
Chicago in the winter?!?

notquitesure
Ice skating is a definate possibility. They have an open rink in the city. There are also horse carriage rides through the city. I thought that would be pretty romantic especially in the winter. Yes PNW...Chicago in the winter. When you've lived in the north all your life you are used to it. Doesn't really bother me.

PNW_Woman
Oh, okay. If you live in the Chicago area, then that's the closest city to you. It is a very fun city with lots to do and see. Just the winters...

Oh Kay
You could go to the lake & watch the submarine races.

notquitesure
haha, i'll pass on that one.

kerplunkLYN
When you've lived in the north all your life you are used to it. Doesn't really bother me.Spend one year in California and you'll take that back!

TamMathis
You could recreate your first date... well unless there were police invovled or something like that... but then again they do have their own handcuffs...

pinkshoes142
Have a getaway in a country bed and breakfast. Its romantic, and you'll be in the country, so all you really have to do is stay in your room and have sex! Bring candles, lingerie, wine, whatever you need to be romantic... and beleive me, she'll love it!

notquitesure
I thought of the first date thing, but we went to some dinky little diner for our first date (Broke college kids). So that's just not good enough for her. I'd love to do the bed and breakfast, but as I posted, we're having a littl trouble with the physical part of relationship. I will have to do that when we get things going again sometime.

pinkshoes142
What kind of physical trouble? Just not having sex??

trudyML
Are you going to make it as a couple to the anniversary date? Saw the other thread.

notquitesure
yeah, i have another topic here "lost our flame". Trying to figure that one out...her sex desire just seems to have disappeared and she thinks that I just want sex all the time. Every time we get a little physical (just kissing sometimes) she stops it because she thinks I just want it to go into sex. But if she would just let things run its course and not jump the gun she would see that I just want a little physical intimacy. Doesn't even have to be sex. Although, i do admit, i do want more sex than I am getting.

notquitesure
make what the anniversary?

Unlikely Unicorn
I kind of like the bed and breakfast idea. Even if you don't have sex, it might be a way to disconnect from everyday life and concentrate on your relationship. Take walks together, cuddle in front of the fireplace, share a bottle of champagne and reconnect with each other by talking and enjoying each other's company. You don't have to have sex, but maybe if you are attentive in ways that are nonsexual, she will be more receptive to sex. It may be what you need to revitalize your sex life. Could be more fun and meaningful than partying it up inside the city!

notquitesure
The bed abd breakfast idea sounds great, even if we didn't have sex. I don't mind that. We're kind of pressed for time, and for now just need a day of something fun. So the bed and breakfast wouldn't really be as relaxing since we have a lot of other stuff going on.

pinkshoes142
I read the other thread... and it seems like she's having emotional problems. Have you tried talking to her about them? If you two are discussing marriage, you should be able to talk about anything, her lack of sex drive should be a topic of discussion. I'm sorry, but a marriage will not work if you don't have sex!I totally agree with Unlikely; do the bed and breakfast thing and get outside of your comfort zones together. Maybe you can reconnect and everything will be wonderful again!I'm sorry you are going through this... I've been where you are and the relationship ended (much later than it should have becuase I stayed, blind to the problems). He stopped having sex with me because he was thinking he wanted to break up, but we never talked about it. For the last few months, I was the initiator (he used to be... most of the time) for every time we had sex.Good luck with the anniversary; and let us know what happens!

notquitesure
yes, I too believe that marriage needs sex. If it is emotional problems, then she needs to come forward when we talk about it, cause she seems to just put it off on me that I just want it too much. I do feel slightly that we could just be in a rut the more I think about it. Hopefully. At this point I think anything would really be out of our comfort zone and good for us. It probably won't take much. I'll try to keep you all updated. You've been supportive, I really do feel positive about things and think they'll go forward.

TamMathis
Has she seen a doctor? There could be a number of reasons for her not to want to have sex. It could be mental, emotional, or even physical. If these have all been explored then maybe there is another reason. Not trying to be the bad guy but hey what other reasons would a person just not want to have sex with their S.O. anymore? Sorry but it's just a thought.

notquitesure
I know what you mean Tam, but I honestly don't think that's the case at all. I have had other people suggest that idea as well, as a thought. I'm starting to think now that we really just got in a bad rut. We just need something to spice things up and it took me a special occasion to realize that. I'll find out this weekend I'm sure.

FNW
Perhaps a nice evening out to dinner (dress up-her in a dress, you in a suit or at least a jacket). Be romantic, but not sexual. In other words, hold her hand, kiss her on the cheek or a light peck on the lips, hold the doors open for her, take her coat, help her put it on/off. Try to pick a restaurant in a high-rise with a view. Make reservations for a window table. Good luck.

notquitesure
That was a thought, there are plenty of high rise buildings in Chicago. The only problem with that was that I wanted to do something during the day and then go to dinner. And depending on the activity, dressing up may not be the best idea, which would mean a nice restaurant would be out of the question (depending on dress code I suppose). Perhaps I could just save the activity, i was thinking ice skating, for another day and just stick with the dinner. This would give two outings...which is good. Any other ideas?

Oh Kay
And depending on the activity, dressing up may not be the best idea, which would mean a nice restaurant would be out of the question (depending on dress code I suppose). You couldn't bring a change of clothes? How far from the city are you? Are you planning on staying there overnight? I think ice skating & then a romantic dinner sounds like a wonderful day.

Thats me A Fairy
I'm with Kay that sounds very romantic

notquitesure
We could bring a change of clothes, but for ice skating you gotta dress warm, especially since the rink is outside in the middle of Chicago. So putting a hat on and getting hat head and possibly getting sweaty, does not go well with dressing up to go to a nice dinner right after, unless you shower. At least thats my thought. I'm thinking dinner at a place where we have to dress nice is a good idea. Not staying overnight though. In Chicago that gets really pricy.

Oh Kay
Oh, well that makes sense. So you'd have to pick one? I think I'd (and this is just me) rather go ice skating & then to a cozy little restaurant than to get all dressed up & go to a fancy restaurant. I don't know about you, but the ice skating means touching, holding hands, catching each other should you fall....then you're cold. You could find a place to have a drink, warm up and just be cozy & close together. But, like I said, that's just me.

FNW
I agree the ice skating can be quite romantic, however, every time I go there seems to be too many little children pushing those upside down buckets darting out in front and tripping me.

Oh Kay
I haven't been ice skating in 30 years. Are the buckets to hold them up?

gsxr750
Notquite: I'm giving up one of my secrets here but hey its for a good cause! Ok buy like 7-8 red single roses and then one dozen. Put the 7-8 roses on the stairs leading to you then have the dozen for her when she follows the roses to you. Here's the trick though, write a short little poem/saying and put it beside each rose leading to you!! Write something like "this rose expresses my love for you or this rose is for how beautiful you are" You get the picture!! She will be puddy in your hands after this, trust me!!

FNW
Yeah, they're for the real little ones, but sometimes the bigger ones use them, too. They scoot them along the ice and hold on to them to stay up, like pushing a shopping cart. It's cute until they get in your way. LOL

Oh Kay
I'd love to go home & go ice skating on the pond where we always skated. I don't know if they even let people skate there anymore, but I sure have some good memories of that place.

notquitesure
I feel like I'd have to choose between really nice dinner or ice skating. Maybe I'll just settle for ice skating and a nice dinner. I can live with that.gsxr, I think we need to get out and about, but your idea sounds great for a little later down the road.

Oh Kay
Maybe I'll just settle for ice skating and a nice dinner. I can live with that.I think that would be cozy & nice. It will give you two a chance to relax & reconnect. I can't wait to hear how it goes.

Thats me A Fairy
I haven't been Ice skating since I left Kentucky. You can out here but its all indoors, I miss the outside rinks with the vendor who sold hot nuts and coco. Go ice skating then dress in jeans and a cute top and go somewhere cozy.